Her One True Love

(Any and all comments are welcome, the more the better thank you)



The day started like any other day, she got ready for work and took the kids to their grandparents’ house for the day. As she drove to work she admired how beautiful of a day it was. The sun was shining as radiantly as she had ever seen. The traffic wasn’t too bad, the cars are moving more like turtles today than snails. She arrived to work right on time and heads straight for her desk. She began her daily routine for the day not knowing that this was the day that would change her life forever.
“NOOOO!!!!” she screamed as she heard the news. She couldn’t believe it. How in the world could this happen? All she could do was sit in her chair and sob uncontrollably. Her co-workers tried to console her to no avail.
“This can’t be happening! He can’t be gone!” she exclaimed. She jumped from her desk and started to grab her belongings.
“Tanji, what is going on? What has happened? Are your boys okay?” asked Stephanie. Tanji and Stephanie were very close friends as well as co-workers and Stephanie was extremely concerned because she had never seen Tanji this upset.
“He’s gone!! John’s gone!” Tanji yelled as she continued to get more and more hysterical as she tries to leave.
“What do you mean he is gone?” Stephanie asked.
“He went to Ohio with his friend to attend a funeral and while he was there he died.” Tanji tried to explain it as calmly as she could but every time she thought of John she broke down again.
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Tanji had met John in December of 2000. He was everything that she had ever wanted in a man. He was tall, 6’3” to be exact. His hair was a gorgeous black color and down to the middle of his back. He was the most amazing creature she had ever met. But, there was one slight problem with him, and her name was Linda.
Linda was John’s wife and Tanji’s best friend. Tanji and Linda met at work in March of 2000 and had an instant connection. It seemed as if they had known each other forever. Tanji could tell Linda anything and know that it would be safe with Linda. As the friendship grew Tanji began to notice how friendly Linda was with the male co-workers. She would often go to lunch with them to provide favors for them. Meanwhile she would leave Tanji specific instructions on what to say to John if he was to call the office.
Tanji and John began talking more to each other. John wanted his marriage to work and so he would ask Tanji for any advice on what he could do. Tanji felt awful about the secrets she was keeping from him concerning Linda. He did not deserve to be treated this way. He had recently had back surgery and was unable to work so he did the entire house duties while Linda continued to work. He kept the house so clean you could eat off of the floor. The laundry was done every day and when he would cook dinner he would bring it to Linda while she sat in the living room and watched TV.
Finally, on December 24 2002, John and Tanji finally decided to take their relationship past the friendship level. Tanji was lucky enough to get off of work early so she headed straight to see John. He was at home and as soon as Tanji drove up he went out to the car. They sat and talked for awhile. The tension between the two was getting greater with every passing minute. She wanted him and he wanted her but who would make the first move? Then it happened, John leaned over and gave Tanji the most passionate kiss that he had ever received. She felt as if she was on cloud nine and going towards clouds ten, eleven, and twelve. The kiss seemed to last forever and was as sweet as the forbidden fruit. Tanji knew from that point that he was the one for her.
On December 26 John called Tanji to let her know that he had left Linda. It took Tanji about 10 minutes to load up the car and to get to John. She felt such a relief to be in his arms. They were inseparable from that day on.
Six months later John had to leave town with his best friend to attend a funeral. Tanji had a funny feeling about this trip and didn’t want him to go. He told her that he had to but that he would be back in a couple of weeks. Tanji hugged him and kissed him for as long as she could not knowing it would be the last time that she saw him.
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Stephanie took Tanji to her car and drove her over to the house where John’s family was at.
“Thank you so much for driving me here,” Tanji told her. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”
Tanji went into the house and collapsed in his mother’s arms. They both cried until they were out of tears.
“What happened to him?” Tanji asked.
“We are not quite sure yet. All we know is that when Robert tried to wake him up he wouldn’t. We won’t know for sure what happened until we get the autopsy and toxicology reports back.”
One month later, after John had been brought home and buried the autopsy and toxicology reports came from Ohio. John had died of a heart attack at the age of 34 years old. The death certificate also listed cocaine as contributing to the heart attack.
John’s mom approached Tanji regarding the drug usage. “Tanji, did you know anything about his drug usage?” she asked.
At that moment his mom knew she could read it all over Tanji’s face. “Yes, I knew.” She responded with her head hanging low. This is one secret that no one had known about John or herself. Tanji had tried cocaine once before but had not touched it again until she got with John. When they were together they started out just getting a small amount, just a twenty. Then, the longer they used the more they used. The largest amount they ever used was a quarter ounce in one night. When John died Tanji only started using more. She was getting wired every night. She wouldn’t go to sleep until the sun started coming up and by that time her kids were getting ready to wake up in the morning.
“Are you still using cocaine?” his mom asked, both out of concern for Tanji and for her children.
“Yes, I know I need to stop but it helps me to escape the pain of losing John.” She replied.
“The pain? What pain do you think I am going through as his mother? I raised him and watched over him. Don’t you think that I am going through pain right now? I can’t just go grab a bottle of beer or a joint because I am hurting! You have two young boys that need you right now. They do not need a mom that neglects them and is high on drugs all the time. Tanji, I will tell you right now if you do come clean with your family about the situation you are in I will and I will also contact child protective services. If you cannot get clean you do not deserve to have your children.”
Within the hour Tanji called her parents to let them know that she had been using for the past 7 months. To say that they were disappointed is putting it mildly. They had raised her in a Christian home and could not believe that this was happening. They also informed Tanji that if she would not get clean then they would also contact children’s protective services.
Tanji knew what she had to do; she had to get clean and sober. “There is no way that I am going to let someone take my children away. Especially for me being stupid.” She thought to herself. From that day on she did not associate in any way with the people that she used to party with. She got her life back on track and has remained clean for 5 years now.
To this day Tanji looks back and feels that John was the love of her life and maybe if they had met under different circumstances things could have been different. But, no one will ever know. What would have happened if they had never used drugs? Would John still be alive today? Tanji asks herself to this day if she would still have John if they had never used. Maybe someday she will find the answer when she sees him again.