A Trip Home

A Trip Home
I had heard about this place before but I have never been here. Groom, Texas is a small town of only 568 people. If you weren’t looking for this town you would drive by it without even noticing it. The one thing that you will notice and the reason I am here is because of the huge cross in the middle of a farm field. As I park my car and get out I notice all of the people that are here in awe of what we see.

“Can you believe how huge this cross is?” a local farmer by the name of Joe asked me.

“I had no idea it was so big. It is amazing. How long has it been here?” I asked him.

“Some local welders built it and installed it back in 1995,” he explained. “We take great pride in this cross and all the sculptures that are here with it. We really feel as if Jesus is here with us each and every day. We are able to reach so many people just out of simple curiosity of seeing the 2nd largest cross in the Western Hemisphere. When they arrive they don’t expect to see an empty tomb or the crosses on Calvary.”

“I can feel the presence of God, it is so wonderful. You can tell how much thought and care were put into the cross and all of these sculptures. I think that my favorite one is the one of Jesus holding the very tiny infant in his hands. It reminds me of the scripture tell us that God knew us before He formed us in our mother’s womb,” I told him. “By Him telling us this it proves that there are no mistakes and that everyone is made for a reason. “

“Well, I better get on back to cleaning the sculptures and getting those darn weeds outta here. You have a good day and enjoy your time here.”

“Thank you so very much.” I responded. As Joe was walking off all I can do is just sit and relish in the love I can feel from God as I sit here in complete and total comfort.

Let Down Again!

“Oh my gosh, what in the world are you doing?” Christina asked. She could not believe that Chris was at home asleep when there are more important things going on that day.

“Uh, what do you mean?” Chris asked half asleep. He seemed to not know what he did wrong.

“You are at home SLEEPING when you are supposed to be up here with your son as he prepares for his second SURGERY.” Christina was trying to keep her cool since she was in public but she was having a hard time doing so.

“DO NOT raise your voice at me. I have tried to get a ride up there and no one can take me up there.” Chris shot back, now he was fully awake and on the defense again. It never failed Chris would screw up and Christina would find out and get mad at him and he would lie to cover up whatever he did.

“Well, if you had not wrecked the car this morning taking your buddy to work we wouldn’t be in this situation. You would be able to be here with your son when he needs you most. But, nnnoooo you chose to give up and take a nap cause you are tired. You know what, I am tired too. I have been at the hospital all night with our son and I have gotten very little sleep but I would not even think about going home and going to sleep. That is probably the most selfish thing that you could possibly do at this point. Why are you so dang selfish that you would rather sleep than be with your six-year-old son when he needs you most?” Christina was past pissed off by this point. She begins to wonder why she is with him especially with him being so selfish. Maybe she needs to rethink this relationship.

“I’m sorry Christina I don’t know what you want me to do. Nothing I do is ever good enough for you. I will try to get up there as fast as I can but I have to find a ride up there.” Chris replied back.

By this time all Christina could see was red. “I don’t care how you get up, I don’t care if you have to walk the 5 miles to get here, just freaking get here and at least pretend that you care for your son.” Christina slammed the phone down and gained her composure as she went back into the room where her son was waiting to go back into surgery.

“Mommy, is daddy coming up here?” Stephen asked.

“He is going to try baby.” Christina told him hoping that Chris would not let his son down.

The lonely room

This room is not much different than all the other rooms she has had. It has a twin size bed, a dresser with a mirror, some pictures on the walls, a radio, and a television. It doesn’t really look like a teenager room but it will do until it is time to move on to the next one. This is the fifth bedroom in three years. It feels as though she is beginning this horrible torture all over again. Will this ever end; will she ever have a home that she can call her own? Will she ever have a family that she can call her own? At this point all she can do is escape to her other world and hope that this room will last more than a month or two.

The not so perfect date

This date story is not quite based on a date as the notes say but once I started writing it just came out so I let it flow.



It was 7:30 and I was on my way out the door to pick up Elizabeth at her house. She only lived about ten minutes away. I was so nervous I could feel my heart beating out of my chest; I had no idea what to expect. This was the first time that I was taking someone out on a date that I had never seen in person. I met Elizabeth through a matchmaking website. I was not having any luck meeting women the “normal” ways of going out to the bars, church, or even the grocery store. I think I am a nice guy. I was raised in a good Christian home. My parents were high school sweethearts and have been married for 38 years. I am 5’10” so I am not too short or too tall. I have a few extra pounds but that is just for extra comfort when cuddling. I have always thought that there is a Mr. or Mrs. Right out there for everyone it is just a matter of when and where they meet them. At the age of 35 I was beginning to wonder if there was someone out there for me; I was getting to the point that if this didn’t work with Elizabeth that I was destined to be single the rest of my life.
I finally arrived at Elizabeth’s house around 7:45 and my hands were practically dripping with sweat. I quickly walked up the front path and eagerly knocked on the front door. Thoughts started racing through my head: would she like me? Am I dressed okay? Will she like my hair? Will she like my jokes or will I sound like a total idiot to her? I quickly snapped myself out of this negative self talk and told myself that we were going to have a very enjoyable evening.
Finally, a beautiful young woman answered the door. She told me that Elizabeth was just finishing getting ready and she would be down in a minute. As I sat on the couch waiting for Elizabeth to come down I remembered the pictures that Elizabeth had posted on her website. She had gorgeous auburn hair and the biggest clear blue eyes that I had ever seen. She had a beautiful olive complexion with just the perfect tan. Her smile looked as though it would light up a room; it definitely made my heart skip a beat when I would look at her picture.
I heard a commotion coming from the top of the stairs, I looked and it was Elizabeth looking as gorgeous in person as she did in her pictures. I was in absolute heaven; this could really be my dream girl. We went to eat at my favorite restaurant, Abuelo’s. The atmosphere was perfect, there was a mariachi band playing in the background, the candles on the table were glistening and dancing as if they were performing just for us. The dinner was absolutely wonderful, I had the beef fajitas and Elizabeth had the cheese enchiladas and then we shared dessert. The conversation never stopped, we were laughing at each other’s jokes and feeling very relaxed with each other.
When dinner was over Elizabeth invited me over for drinks and I couldn’t refuse, I wanted this date to go on all night. We quickly left the restaurant and went straight to her house. Elizabeth went to the wet bar and fixed us both a drink of gin and tonic. As we sat and talked, it seemed like I had known her forever. The more we talked the closer we were moving to each other. Finally, I went in for the kiss and it was just as beautiful and wonderful as she was. This was too good to be true. She took me upstairs to her room so we could have some privacy. When we made it to her room the lights went off and she laid me down on the bed and began kissing and caressing me. This was so awesome, I was finally going to lose my virginity. No one had ever gone this far with me before! Then, it hit me, or should I say, it rubbed up against me. Last I checked I was the only dude in the room. I quickly turned on the lamp by the bed to see a man straddleing me. I have never moved so quick in my life, I pushed him off and grabbed my clothes. I jumped in my car and hauled my butt home. I went straight to the shower and scrubbed my body clean. I could not believe that my dream date was a man!!! Never again will I meet someone on the internet. It is back to the supermarket I go to find my dream woman, in the produce isle.

Third Person

Amy was dreading this day. She woke up at 5:00 to get ready for work but she knew what she had to do first. She grabbed the little white box out of grocery bag and took it to the bathroom. She read the directions on the back of the box and took out the magic wand. “Let stick sit at least two to five minutes before reading results,” she read to herself.

“Dang, that was fast,” she exclaimed. It took less than 30 seconds for the second blue line to appear. Crap, what now. Amy was going to have to tell both Chris (who she now refers to as donor) and her mother, both of which she dreaded.

On the way to work Amy finally called Chris to let him know what is going on.

“Hello?” his dad answered half asleep.

“Tony can I speak to Chris please,” she asked him.

“Hold on just a minute.” He sat the phone down and went to go wake Chris up.

“Hello,” Chris answered half awake half still in his bed.

“Chris I need to tell you something. I’m pregnant.” Amy was very upset at this point and was crying pretty hard.

“Don’t cry,” Chris said, he was trying to sound calm but inside he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want any more kids. He was content with just his first son with Amy. “Come over after work and we will talk about what to do next.”

“K, I get off at 4:00 p.m. so I will be there after that.” Amy said. By this point she was trying to calm herself down and clean her face up so that she would look half way presentable at work. Now, she just needed to figure out how to tell her mom. She decided that she would wait until lunch to tell her.

The day seemed to drag by for Amy. She was hoping that it would take as long as possible to get to lunch so that she wouldn’t have to tell her mother.

Lunchtime finally came; Amy decided that she would grab a bite to eat before making the dreaded phone call. She sat at the table with her best friend for moral support.

“Here goes nothing,” Amy said. “I hope that she doesn’t get to mad.”

“Hello,” her mom answered.

“Hi mom. How are you doing?” Amy asked.

“I’m good, how are you doing?” she asked. She knew something was going on. What was Amy going to tell her? The two worst options would be that Amy was pregnant or if she had gotten fired.

Amy was so nervous at this point her legs and hands were visibly shaking. “Well, I’m pregnant.” She felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off of her shoulders.

“That doesn’t surprise me really,” her mom said “I thought you were going to tell me you had gotten fired.” She knew it why does her daughter get into such predicaments? She could not stand Chris. She knew that he was going to continue to be a dead beat of a dad and she could not understand why Amy was still with him.

Amy didn’t know if her mom was more relieved to know that she hadn’t gotten fired or was wishing that she had gotten fired. All she knew was that she was relieved to have finally told Chris and her mom the news.

First Person Experience

It was 5:00 a.m. and I woke up anxious and completely nervous. Yesterday I went to the store to purchase an EPT test. “I really hope that this turns out negative,” I thought to myself. I already had one son that was two years old; was I ready to be a single mom of two? I went to the bathroom and took the pregnancy test. They say that you should see positive results within two-five minutes; I had positive results in less than 30 seconds. All I could do was stand there in total shock, I had no idea what I was going to tell my mom or Chris (whom I now refer to as “Donor”).


On my way to work I decided to call Chris and let him know the news. I had no idea what he was going to say. I was so nervous and scared to call him. “Hello?” his dad answered the phone.
“Tony, can I speak to Chris, please?” I asked him.

“Hold on a minute, he said. He sat the phone down and went to wake up Chris; after all it was only 6:00 in the morning. Talk about a way to get woken up.

“Hello,” Chris said half awake and half asleep.

“Chris, I have something to tell you. I’m pregnant.” I blurted out. By this time I was in tears because I was so full of emotions I didn’t know what else to do.

“Don’t cry,” he said, “We will figure something out. Come over after you get off of work.”

“Okay, I will talk to you later.” I said as I tried to quit crying so I wouldn’t look like a total disaster when I got to work. Now, my next step is to call my mom and let her know the news. I decided that I would call her at lunch and tell her.

The morning drug about as slow as it could. Finally, the dreaded time had come. I had to call my mom and let her know what has happened.

I first decided I better get something to eat and then give her a call. I grabbed a quick bite in the cafeteria and sat down with my friend for moral support.

“Here goes nothing. Hopefully she won’t be to upset,” I told my friend.

“Hello,” my mom answered.

“Hi mom. How are you doing?” I asked trying to create small talk and stall as much as possible.

“I’m doing good, what’s up?” she asked me. I could tell by the sound in her voice that she knew something was up.

“Well, I have something to tell you,” I started, I was so nervous my legs and hands were shaking like crazy. “I’m pregnant.”

My mom was not a fan of Chris’s so I was kind of scared to find out what she was going to say.

“Well, I am not surprised.” She said. “I thought that you were going to tell me that you had gotten fired.”

At that point I don’t know if she was relieved to know that I wasn’t fired or if she was hoping that I had told her I was fired. All I know is that I was finally glad to tell her and get it off of my chest.

Her One True Love

(Any and all comments are welcome, the more the better thank you)



The day started like any other day, she got ready for work and took the kids to their grandparents’ house for the day. As she drove to work she admired how beautiful of a day it was. The sun was shining as radiantly as she had ever seen. The traffic wasn’t too bad, the cars are moving more like turtles today than snails. She arrived to work right on time and heads straight for her desk. She began her daily routine for the day not knowing that this was the day that would change her life forever.
“NOOOO!!!!” she screamed as she heard the news. She couldn’t believe it. How in the world could this happen? All she could do was sit in her chair and sob uncontrollably. Her co-workers tried to console her to no avail.
“This can’t be happening! He can’t be gone!” she exclaimed. She jumped from her desk and started to grab her belongings.
“Tanji, what is going on? What has happened? Are your boys okay?” asked Stephanie. Tanji and Stephanie were very close friends as well as co-workers and Stephanie was extremely concerned because she had never seen Tanji this upset.
“He’s gone!! John’s gone!” Tanji yelled as she continued to get more and more hysterical as she tries to leave.
“What do you mean he is gone?” Stephanie asked.
“He went to Ohio with his friend to attend a funeral and while he was there he died.” Tanji tried to explain it as calmly as she could but every time she thought of John she broke down again.
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Tanji had met John in December of 2000. He was everything that she had ever wanted in a man. He was tall, 6’3” to be exact. His hair was a gorgeous black color and down to the middle of his back. He was the most amazing creature she had ever met. But, there was one slight problem with him, and her name was Linda.
Linda was John’s wife and Tanji’s best friend. Tanji and Linda met at work in March of 2000 and had an instant connection. It seemed as if they had known each other forever. Tanji could tell Linda anything and know that it would be safe with Linda. As the friendship grew Tanji began to notice how friendly Linda was with the male co-workers. She would often go to lunch with them to provide favors for them. Meanwhile she would leave Tanji specific instructions on what to say to John if he was to call the office.
Tanji and John began talking more to each other. John wanted his marriage to work and so he would ask Tanji for any advice on what he could do. Tanji felt awful about the secrets she was keeping from him concerning Linda. He did not deserve to be treated this way. He had recently had back surgery and was unable to work so he did the entire house duties while Linda continued to work. He kept the house so clean you could eat off of the floor. The laundry was done every day and when he would cook dinner he would bring it to Linda while she sat in the living room and watched TV.
Finally, on December 24 2002, John and Tanji finally decided to take their relationship past the friendship level. Tanji was lucky enough to get off of work early so she headed straight to see John. He was at home and as soon as Tanji drove up he went out to the car. They sat and talked for awhile. The tension between the two was getting greater with every passing minute. She wanted him and he wanted her but who would make the first move? Then it happened, John leaned over and gave Tanji the most passionate kiss that he had ever received. She felt as if she was on cloud nine and going towards clouds ten, eleven, and twelve. The kiss seemed to last forever and was as sweet as the forbidden fruit. Tanji knew from that point that he was the one for her.
On December 26 John called Tanji to let her know that he had left Linda. It took Tanji about 10 minutes to load up the car and to get to John. She felt such a relief to be in his arms. They were inseparable from that day on.
Six months later John had to leave town with his best friend to attend a funeral. Tanji had a funny feeling about this trip and didn’t want him to go. He told her that he had to but that he would be back in a couple of weeks. Tanji hugged him and kissed him for as long as she could not knowing it would be the last time that she saw him.
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Stephanie took Tanji to her car and drove her over to the house where John’s family was at.
“Thank you so much for driving me here,” Tanji told her. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”
Tanji went into the house and collapsed in his mother’s arms. They both cried until they were out of tears.
“What happened to him?” Tanji asked.
“We are not quite sure yet. All we know is that when Robert tried to wake him up he wouldn’t. We won’t know for sure what happened until we get the autopsy and toxicology reports back.”
One month later, after John had been brought home and buried the autopsy and toxicology reports came from Ohio. John had died of a heart attack at the age of 34 years old. The death certificate also listed cocaine as contributing to the heart attack.
John’s mom approached Tanji regarding the drug usage. “Tanji, did you know anything about his drug usage?” she asked.
At that moment his mom knew she could read it all over Tanji’s face. “Yes, I knew.” She responded with her head hanging low. This is one secret that no one had known about John or herself. Tanji had tried cocaine once before but had not touched it again until she got with John. When they were together they started out just getting a small amount, just a twenty. Then, the longer they used the more they used. The largest amount they ever used was a quarter ounce in one night. When John died Tanji only started using more. She was getting wired every night. She wouldn’t go to sleep until the sun started coming up and by that time her kids were getting ready to wake up in the morning.
“Are you still using cocaine?” his mom asked, both out of concern for Tanji and for her children.
“Yes, I know I need to stop but it helps me to escape the pain of losing John.” She replied.
“The pain? What pain do you think I am going through as his mother? I raised him and watched over him. Don’t you think that I am going through pain right now? I can’t just go grab a bottle of beer or a joint because I am hurting! You have two young boys that need you right now. They do not need a mom that neglects them and is high on drugs all the time. Tanji, I will tell you right now if you do come clean with your family about the situation you are in I will and I will also contact child protective services. If you cannot get clean you do not deserve to have your children.”
Within the hour Tanji called her parents to let them know that she had been using for the past 7 months. To say that they were disappointed is putting it mildly. They had raised her in a Christian home and could not believe that this was happening. They also informed Tanji that if she would not get clean then they would also contact children’s protective services.
Tanji knew what she had to do; she had to get clean and sober. “There is no way that I am going to let someone take my children away. Especially for me being stupid.” She thought to herself. From that day on she did not associate in any way with the people that she used to party with. She got her life back on track and has remained clean for 5 years now.
To this day Tanji looks back and feels that John was the love of her life and maybe if they had met under different circumstances things could have been different. But, no one will ever know. What would have happened if they had never used drugs? Would John still be alive today? Tanji asks herself to this day if she would still have John if they had never used. Maybe someday she will find the answer when she sees him again.

Narration and Scene

Narration

I was sitting at the kitchen table helping my oldest son with his homework. I was trying to explain to him how to do the math homework and I could just see the tears coming up in his eyes. I asked him what was wrong and he told me that he was frustrated because the assignment was so difficult. He just broke down in tears and I could see all of the frustration come out of him. It took a moment for him to calm down but once he did then we were able to continue with his homework. I hate seeing him so upset over math. I think that some of this has to do with the fact that we moved to Minnesota half way through his second grade year. The schools in Minnesota are above the schools in Texas and I think that it was a disadvantage for Tyler because he has not been able to catch up to where he should be. By the end of the twenty minutes we had completed Tyler’s homework. He told me that it made more sense to him after we worked through it.

Pure Scene

“Okay Tyler, let’s get your homework done. Tell me how you did number one.” I asked.

“I added 4 plus 6, 8 plus 3, and 8 plus 2.” He said.

“So what is the final answer?” I asked him.

“32, I guess? I don’t know!!!!” he exclaimed.

“What is the matter? Why are you crying and getting so upset about this?” I asked him.

“I am so frustrated. I don’t understand this stuff and it is so hard!!” he exclaimed.

“Calm down, Tyler. This crying is only going to get you more upset. Just take a few deep breaths and calm down. I know that this is hard and I am here to help you understand it and get it completed. It will take some time but we will get this so you can understand it.” I explained to him.

“Okay, I am ready to finish. After I am done can I go outside and play?” he asked.

“First, let’s focus on the homework and then we can think about what to do next when we are done with the homework.” I said.

“Okay, so the answer for this one is 31, right?” he asked.

“Correct, see if you just take your time and work through the problem you can get to the correct answer.” I said.

“Thanks, I think I definitely understand it better now that we have worked through it.” He said.

Scene and Narration

It was around 4:00 when we were finally able to sit down and get out the homework, that Tyler brought home, and tackle it as if we were the best homework workers in the world. Tyler has had a problem with math ever since we moved to Minnesota. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we moved half-way through his second grade year and the teaching method is completely different than in Texas. Sitting down to do math homework, for Tyler, is like torture for him. I think that he would rather have his teeth pulled by pliers without Novocain.

“Okay Tyler, let’s get your homework done. Tell me how you did number one.” I asked. I was eager to find out if all the extra work we had done at home and at school was really working. I wondered if he was making any progress. As his mother I hate to see him struggle and I just wish that I could just give him the answers and he would automatically know what to do. Unfortunately, it does not work that way.

“I added 4 plus 6, 8 plus 3, and 8 plus 2.” He said. So far he had it right. He knew what function to do and he knew what numbers to put together so I was beginning to feel hopeful that we were on the right track.

“So what is the final answer?” I asked him. I was sitting on pins and needles in anticipation of the answer.

“32, I guess? I don’t know!!!!” he exclaimed. He was so upset. You could see the frustration all over his face. I could see the tears building up in his eyes. He was on the verge of a total and complete breakdown. He finally let the tears roll down his face as if the gates of Niagara Falls had broken open.

“What is the matter? Why are you crying and getting so upset about this?” I asked him. I was getting frustrated with his reaction to his math. I know that he knows the answers but he doesn’t try he just guesses and hopes that the answer is right. When the answer is wrong he gets frustrated and mad at himself for getting the incorrect answer.

“I am so frustrated. I don’t understand this stuff and it is so hard!!” he exclaimed. He kept crying and sobbing. He was so upset over the math. Tyler has always been a bright child. When he was in pre-K and kindergarten his teachers told me that when he was old enough he needed to be tested for the gifted and talented program. Now that he is in school here he is struggling in math and reading and his frustration gets me frustrated. I begin to wonder if I made the right choice moving my children 1,200 miles to Minnesota.

“Calm down, Tyler. This crying is only going to get you more upset. Just take a few deep breaths and calm down. I know that this is hard and I am here to help you understand it and get it completed. It will take some time but we will get this so you can understand it.” I explained to him. I try to be as patient with him and let him know that I am there to help him as much as I can so that he can learn as much as he can.

After about a ten minute break Tyler was able to regain his composure and get his frustration under control. “Okay, I am ready to finish. After I am done can I go outside and play?” he asked. He always has a tendency to try and think of things to do next or things that are out of his control. A lot of this has to do with his ADHD and his inability to stay focused for a long period of time.

“First, let’s focus on the homework and then we can think about what to do next when we are done with the homework.” I said. We walked through the problem step-by-step and I showed him where he had made the mistake. It is so nice to see him learning and the light coming on when he figures out the problem.

“Okay, so the answer for this one is 31, right?” he asked.

“Correct, see if you just take your time and work through the problem you can get to the correct answer.” I said. I knew that he could do this. He just has to put his mind to it and he can do anything that he wants.

“Thanks, I think I definitely understand it better now that we have worked through it.” He said. It was such a relief to see the tension and frustration leave his face.
When we were done he put everything in his backpack and hurried outside to play. He was a kid again without any stress or worries or feelings of inferiorority. I just hope that by the end of this school year he has progressed enough to not fall behind in the fifth grade.